Author: polyspeeddating

Register now for Poly in Bloom: Boston-Area Poly Speed Dating on June 9th

We are very excited to announce that Poly in Bloom: Boston-Area Poly Speed Dating is happening on June 9th at the Arts at the Armory in Somerville, MA.  Join us for an evening of meeting and connecting with other ethically non-monogamous people.

Our community spans from Boston and the surrounding areas to New Hampshire, Rhode Island, and central MA. Whether you’re dating as an individual or a group, this event offers a safe and inclusive space to meet like-minded individuals. With a structured format designed to maximize meaningful interactions, you’ll have the opportunity to engage in quick, fun conversations with a variety of potential partners. Expand your social circle, explore new connections, and who knows? You might just find that special someone(s).

Don’t miss out – reserve your spot now and let the sparks fly!  You must register in advance to attend. 

Your registration options are:

INDIVIDUAL  * GROUP  * RETURNING DATER(S)

Event Details:

  • Monday, June 9th, 2025.
  • Doors open at 6:00pm.  You must be present at 7:00pm at the latest (but please show up earlier if possible).
  • We will be charging $30, and expect to sell out.  If we don’t, door price will be $50. If ticket prices are too steep for you, please contact us, as this is designed to be an inclusive event.
  • We have a code of conduct. You must read it: https://polyspeeddating.com/code-of-conduct/
  • There will be some food and drink (with and without booze). Pay bar.
  • The event will be held at Arts at the Armory, 191 Highland Avenue, Somerville, MA
  • This space and event is accessible.  There is limited parking. Taking the Green Line to Magoun Square, or the Red Line to Davis Square and walking up Highland is strongly recommended.  (There are also regular buses.)
  • This is a fundraiser to support and promote various anti-racist activities in the Boston area and beyond.
  • We are constantly looking for organizations, ideally with connections to the broader non-monogamous community, engaged with anti-racist work. If you know of any doing good work, please let us know.

Please remember we are working on an ancient system, meaning bugs may occur. Let us know if things are weird. Want to read more about what the heck all of this is about? Check out our blog post on what actually happens at poly speed dating.

Next event: June 9, 2025

Remember Poly Speed Dating?  Apparently our “twice a year” goal means a “once a year” reality. Spring is a thing, and with it comes that frisky feeling.

We are finalizing the last details and getting our registration site up, but we wanted to send out a “save the date” email for June 9th, with doors at 6:30pm in Somerville as soon as we could.  We will (fingers crossed) launch registration in a couple of weeks, so keep a look out for that email.

If you know of people interested, then have them sign up for our (very, very low traffic) email list at https://polyspeeddating.us12.list-manage.com/subscribe?u=56d6c94f15d73216445f488a3&id=a207b0249f

A reminder: everything we do is incredibly old school. Our systems work, but barely.  We don’t do fancy.  I mean, just look at this web page!

Also, we received an event notice for a panel and mixer on May 12th at the Aeronaut Brewery, Somerville. Details here: https://www.resonancematch.com/events/mixer-for-the-enm-community

Registration for June 20th event now open!

We are pleased to announce we are open for registration!

Your registration options are:

INDIVIDUAL  * GROUP  * RETURNING DATER(S)

Event Details:

  • Thursday, June 20th, 2024 from 6:30-10:00 p.m.
  • Doors open at 6:00pm, and we hope to start dating at 8pm.  You must be present at 7:00pm at the latest (but please show up earlier if possible).
  • We will be charging $30, and expect to sell out.  If we don’t, door price will be $50. If ticket prices are too steep for you, please contact us as this is designed to be an inclusive event.
  • We have a code of conduct. You must read it: https://polyspeeddating.com/code-of-conduct/
  • There will be some food and drink (with and without booze). Pay bar.
  • The event will be held at Arts at the Armory, 191 Highland Avenue, Somerville, MA
  • This space is accessible (accessibility card ideally forthcoming).  There is limited parking. Taking the Green Line to Magoun Square, or the Red Line to Davis Square and walking up Highland is strongly recommended.  (There are also regular buses.)
  • This is a fundraiser to support and promote various anti-racist activities in the Boston area and beyond.
  • We are constantly looking for organizations, ideally with connections to the broader non-monogamous community, engaged with anti-racist work. If you know of any doing good work, please let us know.

Please remember we are working on an ancient system, meaning bugs may occur. Let us know if things are weird.

Want to read more about what the heck all of this is about? Check out our blog post on what actually happens at poly speed dating.

Save the date for June 20, 2024

After quite a long hiatus, we are very excited to announce that Poly Speed Dating is happening June 20th at the Armory in Somerville, MA.  We will open registration in a few weeks, but we wanted to let you know in advance so you can plan.

Please note: We will announce registration on our mailing list when we have started it. If you have questions you can email info@polyspeeddating.com. You can join the mailing list using the link on the right hand side of this page.

The salient details so far:
Doors will open at 6:30pm, and we hope to start dating at 8pm.  You must be present at 7:15pm at the latest (but please show up earlier if possible).
We will be charging $30, and expect to sell out.  If we don’t, door price will be $50.
Some food will be provided. There will be a pay bar. The event will run until around 10 or 10:30pm.
Arts at the Armory is located at 191 Highland Ave, Somerville, MA 02143
Parking is limited.

This is an entirely volunteer operation. No one makes money and the organizers are not paid for their time. We run these events to build community, and any extra funds raised are donated to anti-racist non-profit organizations that we find inspiring.


DISCLAIMERS: We acknowledge that COVID is still a risk factor in our society, and therefore that attending an event such as this is not without risk. We will not be requiring masking, as masking may overly impair people’s ability to communicate in what is likely to be a loud environment. We are going to cap our event, and we reserved all parts of the Armory we could, to attempt to spread people out as much as possible to make mask wearing more feasible and to “thin the air,” so to speak. The logistics of an outdoor event were beyond our small group of volunteers at this time.  We ask you all to remember that Poly Speed Dating is an enterprise that is purely volunteer run, and is generally cash negative. Having an event at all seemed preferable to not, so here we are.

Please note that we are using the legacy code from many years ago, and the internet has marched on since then. If low tech solutions and archaic websites distress you, then perhaps this is not the service for you.

Our mailing list is in tatters.  Please tell your friends and spread the word.

PSD and COVID: What do you want to see happen?

It has been a long time! We are in the process of planning another speed dating event, and the first step is ascertaining what kind of event, if any, people would want to attend. If you are interested in attending a Polyam Speed Dating event, please read this message and then fill out a short survey so we know what you would like to see happen!

In particular, we are trying to weigh the following different trade-offs that we have identified:

First, there is mask wearing. On the one hand, hearing your speed date talk can already be difficult at PSD events, and masks make that harder. Masks also diminish the non-verbal communication that many people do with their faces. On the other hand, masks can reduce the risk of COVID transmission.

Another factor is vaccination. Some events these days expect or verify that all participants are vaccinated against COVID, but such verification can slow down an event’s registration process or increase the logistical burden of running an event. It may also be exclusionary against some people.

Finally, rapid tests for COVID are widely used to decrease the chance of someone who is contagious being present at an event, but rapid tests would be an added cost for participants, and verification of such tests would likely slow down registration.

The final factor is having the event outside vs. inside. While outside would be better for COVID mitigation, doing so could pose some logistical challenges, such as technology, bathroom access, vulnerability to the weather, and potentially even finding a venue.

So, if you have gotten this far, please click on the following link and give us your thoughts: https://forms.gle/dwfD4ZaQQp8gEx1D9

The Network/La Red Domestic Violence Hotline

TNLR hotline

During the current COVID-19 crisis, The Network/La Red’s hotline is still open 24/7. It’s a free and confidential resource for survivors of partner abuse. The Network/La Red is a survivor-led, social justice organization that works to end partner abuse in lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, SM, polyamorous, and queer communities. Rooted in anti-oppression principles, our work aims to create a world where all people are free from oppression. We strengthen our communities through organizing, education, and the provision of support services.

Hotline / Línea de crisis: (800) 832-1901

Durante la crisis del COVID-19, la línea de crisis de The Network/La Red esta disponible 24/7. Es un recurso gratuito y confidencial para sobrevivientes de abuso de pareja. The Network/La Red es una organización de justicia social dirigida por sobrevivientes que trabaja para eliminar el abuso de pareja en las comunidades lesbianas, gay, bisexuales, transgénero, SM, poliamorosas y cuir. Arraigado en los principios de la antiopresión, nuestro trabajo trata de crear un mundo donde todas las personas sean libres de la opresión. Fortalecemos a nuestras comunidades a través de la organización, la educación y la provisión de servicios de apoyo.

Boston Speed Dating September 2, 2019

We are pleased to announce a speed dating event coming up on Monday, September 2nd (Labor Day). In our efforts to build community, we are trying out a few new things this round. Read more below.

Your registration options are:

INDIVIDUAL  * GROUP  * RETURNING DATER(S)

Event Details:

  • Monday, September 2nd, 2019 from 5-9:30 p.m.
  • The event will be held at The Armory, 191 Highland Avenue, Somerville, MA
  • $18.00 preregistration, $25.00 at the door. But no person will be turned away for lack of funds – please contact us!
  • See our accessibility placard for accessibility info–and email if you have further questions.
  • There is limited parking. Taking the T to Davis Square and walking up Highland is strongly recommended. (There are also regular buses.)
  • Check-in starts at 5 p.m.  You must be there by 6:15 p.m.
  • There will be food and drink (with and without booze). Pay bar.
  • We are constantly looking for organizations, ideally with connections to the broader non-monogamous community, engaged with anti-racist work (e.g., The Network/la Red). If you know of any doing good work, please let us know.

New affinity question on the form
Based on some discussion resulting from our Race and Poly house party awhile back, we are adding a new registration question specifically to benefit people of color.  It is “I am a person of color interested in being matched with other people of color for this event.” This will not break other matches, it simply increases the chance of a pre-existing match between two people who check off this box.  We look forward to hearing what people think of this new addition.

Call for Art!
For this event, we are trying to put together an art show. In particular we are interested in art that represents different experiences and backgrounds. We are especially looking for artists of color who have work that is about their experiences with nonmonogamy (even obliquely). We will likely be limiting ourselves to wall art, given space constraints, but are open to other ideas. If interested, please send us three images of your art and a short self-description.

Social Media
We are not good at social media. But perhaps that will change. If you want to follow us on Twitter, you can: see @bostonPSD (for Boston local stuff, such as open reg announcements) and @polyspeeddating (for the full world-wide stuff, in theory).

Save the date, plus other stuff

We have several pieces of news!

  1. Save the date for our next event!
  2. Poly businesses list
  3. Upcoming workshop (signal boost)
  4. PSD art show
  5. Twitter
  6. Coding help request

First, we have a date for our next event! Please mark down the evening of Monday, September 2nd (Labor Day). We will once again be at the Armory in Somerville, with doors opening at 5:00 PM, doors closing at 6:15 PM sharp, and ideally dating starting at 7 PM. Stay tuned for an email in Early August when we open registration.

Second, we have been receiving several emails from therapists and other service providers seeking to email the folks on our list. We have decided to put together an informal directory of poly businesses (either poly related, or owned by poly people) to provide a controlled outlet for all of these requests and to help people find one another. If you are interested in being part of this directory, please email us with your contact information and a short blurb describing what you are offering.  We will collate and post publicly.

Thirdly, in this vein, we recently were told about an upcoming nonmonogamy workshop.  The details are below, if interested.

Finally, we are trying to put together an art show for our next speed dating event to give people something to look at, other than our pretty selves. In particular we are interested in art that represents different experiences and backgrounds. We are especially looking for artists of color who have work that is about their experiences with nonmonogamy (even obliquely). We will likely be limiting ourselves to wall art, given space constraints, but are open to other ideas. If interested, please send us three images of your art and a short self-description.

We are not good at social media. But perhaps that will change. If you want to follow us on Twitter, you can: see @bostonPSD (for Boston local stuff, such as open reg announcements) and @polyspeeddating (for the full world-wide stuff, in theory).

If you are a coder and have some free cycles to deploy, we are in crunch mode and could really use some help! Contact us if you are willing to lend a hand.  Also, WordPress-knowledgeable folks!

And now, details of the aforementioned nonmonogamy workshop of “Exploring Alternatives to Monogamy” run by Eileen Casella Rider, LMHC & Elizabeth Boskey, LISCW

Non-Monogamy is not for everyone. Is it for you? This weekend retreat is for people who are thinking about exploring alternatives to monogamy – whether you’ve already opened up your relationship or are just wanting to explore options. This two-day workshop is designed for those who want to explore the joys and challenges of alternatives to monogamy in a judgment-free setting. We’ll examine insecurity, fear and jealousy that may have prevented you from talking openly with your partner about non monogamy. Eileen’s clinical style is gentle and easy, setting the tone for self-compassion allowing you to explore the depths of your love. Elizabeth’s clinical style is friendly and welcoming, encouraging comfortable explorations of boundaries and looking for new ways to increase joy.

Open to LGBTQ+ Individuals and Couples
Saturday August 17 and Sunday August 18
Whispering Pines Conference Center
Alton Jones Campus-West Greenwich
Call Eileen Casella Rider at 401-351-0111 for more information

Disclaimer: This workshop is not an officially PSD-vetted event; it was sent in by a member of the community

Join us for a discussion about race and racism in our poly communities

Please join us for “A discussion about race and racism in our poly communities.” At this event, jointly hosted with Community Change, Inc (CCI), we will first listen to a cross-race dialogue with a few non-monogamous people with a shared history of poly and sex-positive community, and then open it up to wider discussion.

We hope that this party will be one piece of working to dismantle racism on the interpersonal and structural level within non-monogamous communities. We will get to talk about issues such as bringing one’s anti-racism to one’s poly, why so many of our communities are so white, how we can work to create authentically open and inviting spaces, and intersectionality and vulnerability in marginalized communities.

We will also get to hear about CCI’s work from CCI’s Executive Director, Shay Stewart-Bouley (the award-winning writer known as Black Girl in Maine). CCI is one of the organizations that we have been supporting for awhile now. This gathering is both a fundraiser in support of CCI’s much needed and critical work and also an opportunity to engage in authentic dialogue.

We hope you can make what is sure to be an interesting and engaging conversation about race and ourselves.

Time: 1-3pm on June 2nd in Union Square, Somerville (we will send specific address closer to the date to those who RSVPed affirmatively)

Please RSVP by sending email to luke@polyspeeddating.com so we can get an accurate head count, as space is limited!

Luke’s cell phone is (510) 735-7635, if you need help finding the place or want further information.

Some refreshments will be provided

This event is organized by Luke (one of your poly speed dating organizers) in conjunction with CCI and the house of Shimmy Everlasting.

 

Some further information

Q: Tell me more about Community Change, Inc.?

A: Community Change, Inc. (CCI) is a nonprofit that provides opportunities for people to learn about institutional racism and take action to combat it. At more than 50 years old, Community Change Inc is the oldest, continuously running anti-racism organization in the country. While CCI’s been doing this work for 50 years, it’s needed now more than ever. CCI focuses on engaging white people on this issue because it identifies racism as a white problem. CCI’s program includes anti-racism trainings with community groups and organizations, and regular e-mail alerts about ways to support organizations led by people of color that are fighting against discrimination in housing, jobs, education, health care and other areas. Their website is http://www.communitychangeinc.org/

 

Q: Is this a kid friendly event?

A: While the conversation and event itself is not at all child oriented, you are welcome to bring your kids and have them read in the corner or on the porch. We will even give them snacks.

 

Q: Are their pets in the house?

A: Not in the part of the house you will be in!  Dander-free!

 

Q: And the next Poly Speed Dating event?

A: Assuming all goes well, we are in the process of scheduling for mid August, 2019.